Comedy Bites

Como isto é um blog com uma ligeira veia cómica, vou postar aqui algumas quotes das minhas comédias favoritas. Algumas são de filmes recentes, outras de filmes menos recentes, mas representam todas pequenos momentos de estupidez que me fizeram, fazem e fazerão rir sempre como um tolinho. E para começar, o verdadeiro filme panteonesco, a odisseia memorável de "El Duderino e Compinchas".


The Big Lebowski

- Calmer than you are...

- Laughable, man. Ha Ha! I would have fucked you in the ass Saturday. I fuck you in the ass next Wednesday instead. WOOOOOOOOO!

- Good night, sweet prince.


Monty Python and The Holy Grail

- NI!!!

- Let's not go there after all...Camelot is a silly place...

- There are some who call me... Tim.


High Fidelity

- What fuckin' Ian guy ?!?!

- It'd be like sleeping with Talia Shire in Rocky if you weren't Rocky.

- God. Do you even know your daughter? There's no way she likes that song. Oops, is she in a coma?


About a Boy

- It was terrible! Terrible! But driving really fast behind the ambulance was fantastic!

- I am an island. I am bloody Ibiza!

- No, no, you've always had that wrong about me. I really am this shallow.


Bad Santa

- Oh yeah, baby, you won't be able to shit right for a week!

- What are you, my fucking mother? You shat me out of your womb?

- Great. Another fucking Mongoloid.


Bubba Ho-Tep

- It'd been two presidential elections since I'd had a boner like that.

- Don't make me use my stuff on ya, baby!

- But what do I care? I got a growth on my pecker.


Dodgeball

- If you can dodge a wrench...you can dodge a ball.

- Thank you Chuck Norris.

- HASSELHOFF! HASSELHOFF! HASSELHOFF!


Adaptation

- Who's gonna play me? I think I should play me.

- Then one morning, I woke up and said, "Fuck fish."

- Maybe I should write something first, then reward myself with coffee. Coffee and a muffin. So I need to establish the themes. Maybe a banana nut. That's a good muffin.


Dumb & Dumber

- Just when I thought you couldn't get any dumber, you go and do something like this... and totally redeem yourself!

- Here it is! "Samsonite"! I was way off! I knew it started with an "S" though.

- According to the map we've only gone 4 inches.


Sideways

- No, if anyone orders Merlot, I'm leaving. I am not drinking any fucking Merlot!

- Don't you just want to feel that cozy little box grip down on your johnson?

- Why don't you drink some Aqua Fria ?